Torture the Data (and It'll Confess) Unisex T-shirt

We're just going to say it: This shirt is hilarious.
(and not available in stores)

It's based on a famous quote warning against the temptation of over-manipulating a dataset: “Torture the data long enough and it will confess.”

Statisticians, data scientists, machine learning experts... data geeks of all stripes will get the joke and love the shirt.

Funny because it’s true.

Comic artist, Alton Johnson, creates the scene for us: 

• Gloomy dungeon lit only by a torch
• Dungeon master just doing his job
• Sadistic data scientist keeping warm with her caffè latte
• Weak regression analysis on the rack, right on the edge of confessing. Let's hope the data holds out. 

Plus the shirt on your body matches the scientist's Argyle sweater and blouse. Priceless.

#IYKYK

If you don’t know, here's an explainer from Learn Statistics Easily:

The maxim, “If you torture the data long enough, it will confess to anything,” is a poignant caution in data science, echoing the critical need for ethical scrutiny in data analysis. This sentiment, attributed to various thought leaders over time, encapsulates the peril of data manipulation — where relentless and skewed data interrogation can lead to spurious and misleading conclusions. In statistical analysis, this adage serves as a stark reminder of the fine line between rigorous inquiry and the undue coercion of data, underscoring the paramount importance of adhering to ethical standards to preserve the integrity and truthfulness of analytical outcomes. 

The earliest known usage of this exact phrase is 1971, by British mathematician Irving John Good. People loved his pithy remark. You can find Good’s transcript in the June 1972 edition of The American Statistician.

However, Ronald Coase seems to get credit for it most frequently. Coase was a British Nobel Prize-winning economist who introduced the notion of transaction costs. Not very sexy stuff, but important.

Garson O’Toole of Quote Investigator also cites this 1933 passage (among many others) found in The Elementary School Journal:

The evidence submitted by the committee from its own questionnaire warrants no such conclusion. To torture the data given in Table I into evidence supporting a twelve-hour minimum of professional training is indeed a statistical feat, but one which the committee accomplishes to its own satisfaction.

Love it.

LIMITED TIME ONLY!
Offered exclusively to QI Curiosities customers.

Our sharp green tee is comfy, soft, and lightweight, with the right amount of stretch.  

• 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (Heather colors contain polyester)
• Fabric weight: 4.2 oz./yd.² (142 g/m²)
• Pre-shrunk fabric
• Side-seamed construction
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Blank product sourced from Nicaragua, Mexico, Honduras, or the US
• Artist: Alton Johnson

This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!

Size guide